The Fairway Close Cat - Part 1 of Kill Your Darlings

When my babies were proper tiny babies, my days and nights were consumed by their development leaps, playgroups and those long dinner, bath, and bed rituals that bound us to the house in hope that if everything was done just the right way and the stars aligned we might all get some sleep. None of my babes were wonderful sleepers. Coffee was a lifeline to carry me through the days but even at that time, I heeded other mothers' warnings that the nights would end and I would miss them when they did (even though my eyes constantly begged for me to shut them, if only for a minute.)

Many women say that when they have children they discover a deeper connection and respect for their own mothers. In a sense, many women "come back" to needing their mothers after having their own child, so that they can be guided through their own motherhood. In this coming together, new mums say they feel a tremendous sense of gratitude to their mother as they process first-hand all the patience, effort, and loving care it takes to get a child through those sleepless crying nights, the brain developments, the piles of homework and the social and emotional challenges of the fraught teenage years. 

All I can think about is the Laura Ashley floral jumpsuit I saw on the buy, swap, sell page today. Two of my kids are yelling at each other, actually I'd say more screaming over who likes the colour blue more. I can see there are tears of anger brewing in my seven year old's eyes as he struggles to comprehend how on earth his nine year old brother could possibly even think he likes the colour blue more. My eleven and four year old are singing along to Harry Styles on the karaoke machine at the top of their lungs in a pitch that is making my eyes twitch.

“We cannot live the second half of our lives in the same way as we lived the first.” Carl Jung wrote this sentence in his famous paper ‘The Stages of Life’ and it has been ruminating in my mind for some time now as I embark on - ‘midlife’.

Just like birthing babies and weeing in your pants a little every time you laugh, advice and motherhood seem to go hand-in-hand. As soon as you’re pregnant everyone you’ve ever met is suddenly overcome with the desire to tell you everything you must do to survive. So, what is the best mothering advice? What are the gems of wisdom that will save your sanity, especially in the early days of mothering, and what is the rubbish you can immediately toss aside?

It’s no secret that modern day mothers are the jack of all trades. We are the shapeshifters of our families, often wearing many hats just so that all the other members of the clan can not only survive, but be the best versions of themselves.